Finding Light in the Holiday Season

Coping with Seasonal Slumps, Grief, and Family Time

The holidays can be a wonderful time of lights, music, family, and warmth. But for many of us, they also bring a mix of stress, sadness, and loss. Whether you’re dealing with seasonal depression, grieving someone you’ve lost, or navigating family time that isn’t always easy — you’re not alone, and this is a space to help you feel seen.

“The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate.” — Oprah Winfrey Socratic Method

Yes — big quote. But even someone as influential as Oprah reminds us that finding the good doesn’t mean ignoring the hard. It means acknowledging both.

Why this time of year can feel heavy

• Shorter days and less sunlight can trigger seasonal depression (sometimes called seasonal affective disorder or SAD). Research shows less daylight, disrupted sleep‑wake cycles, and changing moods are all part of the seasonal risk. Verywell Health Family Counseling Services

• Grief and loss don’t pause for the holidays. That first year without a loved one (or the first holiday without “how things used to be”) can be especially intense. The emotions may feel heavier when everyone else seems “celebrating.” CHOC - Children's Health Hub

• Family time can bring joy and stress. Whether you’re single, partnered, empty‑nesting, or navigating blended family dynamics — expectations, traditions, obligations all surface. And if you’re also dealing with seasonal mood shifts or grief, those gatherings might feel more like a hurdle than a haven.

• It’s okay to feel multiple things at once. You may celebrate, and you may mourn. You may feel connected and isolated. Both can live comfortably in your heart, and you don’t have to force one over the other.

Three practical tips for this season

Here are three actionable strategies to help you navigate the holidays with more ease — whether you’re alone, with family, or somewhere in‑between.

1. Make a plan with intention (and permission to pivot) Create a flexible plan for yourself: pick a few moments you’ll lean into (walk in the daylight, call a friend, read a book you enjoy) and identify a safe choice if you need to step away from a gathering or tradition. Having even a small outline gives you back a sense of agency.

For instance: decide you’ll attend the family dinner, but also build in a 10‑minute walk outside right after (helps with mood and sunlight). Or decide you’ll spend time with friends instead of family this year if that feels more supportive. It’s not about doing it “the way it always was” — it’s about doing it the way you can this year. It’s okay to change or pause tradition. Mayo Clinic Health System

2. Move your body + connect with others Physical activity and connection (even small ones) are powerful. Research on seasonal depression shows that outdoor time, movement, and social contact help interrupt the cycle of fatigue, isolation, and low mood. Verywell Health Council for Relationships

So:

• Take a brisk walk with your coffee.

• Send a voice note to a friend instead of a text.

• Use the “meeting someone for 15 minutes” trick — short meetups count.

• In gatherings, make one meaningful connection rather than trying to entertain everyone.

  
  

3. Honor your feelings and set boundaries If you’re grieving, it’s important to both acknowledge the loss and give yourself permission to feel joy when it comes. Feelings aren’t opposites, they’re layered. “You can miss someone and still feel love and laughter this season.” Experts say giving space to both grief and celebration reduces isolation and helps you stay grounded. PBS National Council on Aging

Also: when family demands or traditions feel heavy, it’s okay to say “I’ll join for this part” or “I’ll come later” or “I’ll skip this event if I need to rest.” Setting those boundaries is an act of self‑care, not selfishness.

Bringing it all together

As someone who’s single, I recognize that holidays might look different this year — maybe you’re creating your own tradition, gathering with friends instead of family, or simply choosing peace over pressure. That’s valid and powerful.

If you’re dealing with seasonal depression or grief and it’s making basic tasks harder (sleep feels impossible, motivation is gone, you’re isolating more than usual), it might be worth talking to a mental health professional. You don’t have to carry it alone.

And if family time is approaching and you’re unsure how you’ll show up or who’ll be there—know this: you bring value. Your presence, your quiet love, your story—these are worthy. And setting a little intention (even to just “breathe through dinner”) can shift the energy.

Final thought

Let yourself lean into the good, lean into the hard, and somewhere in between find the space that feels right for you. As Oprah says, “The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate.” Even if this year’s celebration is quiet, even if it looks different — it still matters. Your experience matters.

Wishing you gentleness, connection, and light this holiday season. You’re not alone.

References for Finding Light in the Holiday Season

• “Supporting Your Mental Health During the Holiday Season.” SAMHSA. 2023. SAMHSA

• “Beat Seasonal Depression With These 3 Tips That Experts Swear By.” Verywell Health. 2024. Verywell Health

• “Navigating the Winter Blues: Tips to Combat Seasonal Depression.” Council for Relationships. 2024. Council for Relationships

• “Coping with Grief During the Holidays.” Children’s Health Orange County (CHOC). 2022. CHOC - Children's Health Hub

• “Coping With Grief Over the Holiday Season.” U.S. Department of Homeland Security Blog. 2023. Department of Homeland Security

• Oprah Winfrey quote: “The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate.” Socratic Method